I miss you Catnip
by EmotionsRuleOurLives
Summary: After 'Mockingjay' SPOILERS if you haven't read that far. This is the final goodbye between Katniss and Gale. How do you say goodbye to the person you couldn't survive without, and now after everything, you can't live with them in your life either.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone :) sorry I've not done any stories for a while, I've had so much going on it has been crazy! I'm trying out a new book 'The Hunger Games' and wanted to give a go at writing my idea on how certain scenes that didn't happen in the book should have... well happened. This one is just a tester for me while I plan what other parts I'd like to do and I thought that I'd share it with you and see what you think? I'm going to continue this part if you like it and start the rest maybe tonight or tomorrow :D Please review otherwise I won't know whether to continue with it or not xx**

"I miss you Catnip" Gale whispered to the floor to prevent his voice from cracking and the tears being completely in view to sparkle down his cheeks. He leant against the bricks with one foot against the wall and both arms wrapped like chains around his torso.

"I've not been Catnip for a long time Gale. And you know that"

"You will always be her to me Katniss! No matter what you believe, or how much you think you've changed and how much you've gone through. I will always be here for you. Always. You're the girl I can't live without. You alone represent my whole life! You are the laughter in my childhood, the reason my family is alive and… the love in my heart" he said the last part peeking up at me through his eyelashes, his cheeks showing the hint of rose blooming with the hope of my affection in return.

"Gale, maybe something could have happened between us. But you, you murdered… killed… burned alive my lit… tle sister!" I said moving to stand right in front of him. "I can't even look you in the eyes, I can't feel your hands anymore without knowing that your fingers built and protected that weapon" I said turning my head sharply.

My whole body froze, it was like my first shower in my victor house when I forgot to put the hot water on and the freezing stream of ice water poured down my spine. It was like that moment in the reaping when I couldn't understand what was happening, my whole world was falling apart at them two words Effie cheered across the square, "Primrose Everdeen!" I'm stood here telling Gale-my partner, the person I thought I couldn't survive without- that I don't want him. I look up to unleash the words that will tear his heart; just like that whip did to his back so long ago. The words that will shatter whatever is left of mine, into a million pieces that will be added to the emptiness where my life should be.

**Please go easy on me this is my first time for years doing one :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the reviews! This isn't finished I will upload the rest tomorrow when I've changed some bits I'm not too happy with. But I said I would publish soon so here is some andlet me know what you think :) Hope this is OK x**

I looked up and met his grey eyes, mine full of determination, his full of desperation.

Memories flooded into my consciousness filling my mind with nothing but the first time I looked into those same but fresher eyes. When we first met their colour reminded me of small pieces of coal, a new substance to help with my survival and the hint of familiarity. I'd never been hunting with anyone after my father -unless you count my horrific attempt with Pr… her. But his eyes were that one thing that helped my mind to trust him, after knowing him for only a few seconds I could see that we were alike. I could see the pain in his eyes, the same pain that I saw in the mirror every morning after waking up to see my sister, curled up against a stranger of a mother and be protected by that loyal –ugly- cat. Those familiar eyes used to never leave my face while he was waiting for a change in my expression, a change that would prove to him that I was untrustworthy. When we were counting up our first catch that day when he crept into my life, his eyes remained stuck on my small but lethal hands, waiting for the second that I would lift an arrow and steal all his hard work.

I could feel my eyes start to sting as they became focused back on to his patient expression, then a slow blink returned me to my dream like state while another memory claimed me.

It was the first day that we found our place up in the hills; it was so amazing I remember my heart warming for the first time in the woods since my father taught me how to swim in the small pond. When we both sat down in the place that soon became our retreat and where he could shout about the capital all he liked I caught the glint of his eyes. My perspective on them had changed. Now they reminded me of silver, something otherworldly to me, something glorious, rare and something that was in really high demand but was mine. I remember trying to imagine my life without him having my back but I couldn't, where I live was depressing enough I didn't want to imagine my life being any worse.

I looked at Gale now, he must have seen the change in my face when I thought of losing him all those years ago because his lips were turned up at the sides with hope. I was about to shoot that hope down –straight through the eye.

**I can't wait for you to read the rest I hope you like what I've done! Let me know please :D **

**Thank you to Eeeep, Ellenka, Andrea Weasleyy, countrywolf22 and AnEpicStory for the amazing reviews x**

(AnEpicStory i can't send you a message but that would be so nice if you did draw it :D x )


	3. Chapter 3

**This finishes the short story on how I thought the scene should have happened :)**

** I'm going to do more scenes like this that were missed out of the novel, like maybe Katniss and Peetas wedding? Peetas point of view when Katniss first finds him in the arena when he's dying? When Peeta wakes up to find Katniss next to him bleeding from the head injury? Prims point of view at the reaping? and a few more, Which one would you like me to do and any more you want me to do just ask please :) Ideas are welcome. **

I've never been good with emotions so I took a deep breath, let the air fill my lungs and blew it out as I met his eyes, maybe for the last time. As my eyes started to tear up and sting even more, I realised what Gales eyes finally looked like to me. Now they seemed like mist, something I can't touch, something foreign but also something I just can't see past. He is blocking my view, my future. I can't try to carry on with my life if I can't stop thinking about that horrible event that took place outside Snow's mansion.

"Gale" my voice cracked,

"Just tell me Katniss, I'll do or be anything that you need me to be, I just want you to be as happy as you can possibly be" he said with his tears now in full view streaming down his face. The use of my full name showing just how serious he was taking the conversation, I was glad he was listening completely because I could only say the words once. These words were the last he could use to persuade me and he knew there was nothing left he could say. My mind was set.

The room was silent, the only thing I could hear was the hiccup in both of our breaths and the tears hitting the floor.

"Gale it's over, whatever it was that was between us, whatever it was that could have happened to twist our futures even more tightly together has gone."

"Katn…" I held my hand up to stop him and to tell him I'm not finished.

"You were my saviour Gale, you kept my arms strong when they tired from holding my bow up all day, you powered my legs to keep running when I felt I couldn't go on and made every pain I felt seem like a small price to pay to keep on living"

His gaze locked to my face because he knew the seconds that he was able to see me was limited and counting down.

"But after everything you've done for me-"

"It can't compete with what I might have done to your sister" He finished my sentence sliding to the floor.

I knew I didn't have to tell him that he was right so I just took a step forward and crouched down next to him.

"Gale I love you, if that day hadn't happened then maybe something would have grown between us. But I can't go back in time Gale, and I can't forget what happened. We're stuck in a game in a way that could be seen as worse than The Huger Games. In the arena the game was changing and pieces playing were altered so often, that sometimes you completely lost hope. But then something would happened and adjust everything to give you the opportunity to turn your chances around and have a possibility of winning. In there you had no idea what would happen and how it would end. What we're going through now is the opposite, our pieces aren't changing. As some people would say, we've been dealt a hand and now we have to play on with what we have. Our fate is written in blood, our future is set and it's set that we're no longer supposed to live the rest of our lives with any form of relationship between us."

"So there's no hope for us anymore? Nothing I could do or say? No way I could change even the smallest of pieces?"

"The game is over Gale. There is nothing left to do. Every time I see you I'm not just seeing you, I'm seeing Prim after the bomb and hearing her scream my name!" My eyes were so blurred that I couldn't see him anymore, my heart was ripping, the Goosebumps on my body had changed from being over sensitive to numb. I couldn't feel my body. My mind was trying to shut down what I had just done and how much I had lost. "I'm going to miss you having my back" I said trying to smile weakly.

"I'll always have your back Catnip, even if I'm miles away I'll come right to your side if you need me"

We both stood up and looked at each other for one last time.

"I'm so sorry Gale" I whispered as I leant in and he wrapped his arms around my waist like he has done in the past. A final hug to say goodbye and good luck.

"No, you have no reason to be sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry for everything that has ever gone wrong in your life that I couldn't protect you from, and I'm sorry for that stupid decision I made with Beetee. That stupid decision I'll just have to regret for the rest of my life."

**Please review or I won't know what I've done wrong/what you don't like and what you do like :) your reviews give me more reason to update quicker because I don't want you waiting. If you don't like them then I know to stop doing them haha x**

**Thank you for the reviews since the last time I said this haha! Ellenka, O, Life1428 x**


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